Sweet Visit, Kansas-bama

Location: Kansas: Some City: Some barn.

I parked my motorbike beside the chicken coop, delibrately scaring all the mother hens.

I saw a light turn on in the house and quickly ran to the front door and tapped lightly, I didn't want to get told off for scaring hens. Then I'd never hear the end of it. The door opened to reveal an elderly looking woman, who's pictures haunted me at every Thanksgiving when Clark would do his speech on how much he loves his family.

"Hello?" she asked squinting at me, "hi, I'm Dick Grayson, you wouldn't mind passing on a message for me to Kon-El?" she looked at me wearily when I said Kon-El, realisation dawning on her face that I was a hero not a villian.
"Yes Dearie".

I nodded and took a deep breath "please tell Conner that I will be sending those pictures of him in that cute little Flamebird outfit" Ms.Kent frowned in confusion.

"Yeah, yeah, he can threaten me with those pictures of me and Ravager but all he'll do is prove to the guys that he's desperate. Rose is pretty much the superhero bike, everyone has had a ride but him".

"Yeah I had a ride to but who could resist and how was I to know she was underage. She has so many problems I doubt she even know's her age. Sure he acts like he gets as many girls as he has hormones but the only love he's gotten is from a supervillianess who even slept with Wonder Man. The point I want to get across to Conner is - I didn't loose my virginity in a barn and my pick-up lines are better" Ms.Kent stood there staring at me without making a sound.

"Thanks, anyway. Oh, and say hi to Clark" I ran off and drove home.

I kick of my shoes the moment I get home and drop my jacket on the floor.

It had been a long flight back from Kansas to Gotham, well it had been a short flight it just felt long because the only film that was shown was Just My Luck and all the air stewardesses were frosty 65 year olds.

I entered my dark room and scrambled to find the light switch as I took of my shirt and dumped it on a chair, or a drawer- or something.

"Eureka!" I flicked the light switch and stumbeled over my Maxim magazines.

"You know it takes a real man to wear a domino mask, but it takes a real man to have a body like that" my head jolted up to see Kara.